Confidare India Men's Rights Center

What are your views on Men's Rights Movement?

We must save the Family System in India.
We have to change the gender biased laws in India like 498a, DV act etc and men must be give shared parenting.
We must work to end all forms of discrimination of men in society including male suicides.
We must focus on humans rather than dividing ourselves as men, women etc. All this women's rights and men's rights is useless.

What are your views on abuse of men by women based on your experiences in life?

Today, urban women have become very abusive to their husbands.
I find wives beating up husbands as funny.
I have seen my mothers/sisters/aunts/other female relatives verbally abusing their husbands.
Feminism makes women abuse their husbands.

According to you what is feminism?

Feminism is a global movement to discriminate and spread hatred against men.
Feminism's main goal is to help oppressed women and end discrimination against women in the society.
Feminism is all about forcing governments to create pro-women laws.
Feminism is a movement to create gender equality between men and women.

A guy already has got a domestic violence case on him by his wife. Now, his separated wife is threatening to life a false dowry cases. What should he do?

If she files a dowry cases, then he should file DP3 case on wife and get ready to file couple of perjury cases.
He should try to have negotiations with wife and her parents using family elders.
He should start staying in his friend's house near his office.
He should immediately file for divorce so that he can prove she is filing dowry case to take revenge.

In "Save Indian Family" local chapter meetings, you find a guy is giving bad legal advice. He is scaring people telling horror stories of jailing etc and urging guys to compromise and do settlements before dowry case is filed. He does not listen to you even after you telling him to stop doing this for couple of times. He does not even listen to couple of other leaders. What will you do?

I will deal with him patiently and explain in humble tone again that he must not discourage our members.
I will avoid him as much as possible. I am in the movement for saving myself from legal terrorism, section 498a, DV act etc and I will leave it to other leaders to deal with it.
I will handle him diplomatically as any fight and division will disturb the unity in the movement. He had come to last protest for father's rights.
I will straight tell him not to come to meetings and work to expel him from "Save Indian Family" local chapter meetings.

Why many of our members/activists do not contribute to the letter campaigns, protests, volunteering etc?

Most leaders do not make demands from members to contribute to campaigns and activism.
Members are busy in fighting cases and they have no time for volunteering.
If we really help men in their court cases giving good legal advice, they will certainly contribute and volunteer.
I am not bothers about what other members contribute or do not contribute. I am contributing in campaigns. That is what matters.

Every 18 minutes a married woman commits suicide in India. In how many minutes a married man commits suicide in India?

1 minute
12 minutes
36 minutes
8 minutes.

Who wrote the famous book about of plight of men,"Myth of Male Power"?

Thomas Ellis
Warren Farrell
Roy Baumeister
Christina Hoff Sommers.

Age old Indian family system is in crisis today. What should all men’s rights activists do?

We all must work to save the institution of marriage.
We all must promote traditional religious values.
We must not bother to save family system.
We all must listen to advice of elders, who have got experience about life.

What are your views about section 498a of Indian Penal Code that was enacted in 1983 to give teeth to laws to curb dowry.

Section 498a is to be scrapped.
Section 498a is a well-intentioned law, but its misuse has to be stopped.
Section 498a has to be kept non-bailable and instead made gender neutral.
Section 498a must be kept as it is because there are still women burnt for dowry in India.

What are your views about Indian Men’s Rights Movement?

We all have to be united and we must not fight among each other.
We must stop giving guidance to men, who do not contribute to our campaigns.
We all must seek donations from Government and Private sector for funding our campaigns.
We have to talk about all human beings rather than focusing on women’s rights or men’ rights. Our mothers and sisters are also suffering due to these biased laws.

What are the main goals of feminists?

The main goal of feminists is to spread hatred against men.
The main goal of feminists is to create gender equality in the society.
The main goal of feminists is to collect billions of rupees of donations for personal use.
The main goal of feminists is to empower younger women, while ignoring interests of older women or rural women.

Government is passing the laws to discriminate men,

Because of pressure from feminists.
Because Government wants to protect genuine women victims from abuse from a few uncivilized men.
Because the society itself hates men.
Because there is no real awareness about the misuse of gender biased laws.

What are your views about any man remarrying after divorce?

Every man has to settle down, otherwise life will be very lonely.
Not all women are bad.
A wife can look after his old parents.
He may not remarry again.

What are your views about bride burning?

There are still women getting burnt for dowry in India.
People who burn women for dowry must be strictly punished, but no innocent man must be harassed by misuse of laws.
Bride Burning is a feminist hoax.
There are so many reports of bride burning in the media.

A guy and his parents have got bail from court last week. He calls you for advice. What will you advise him?

I will advise him to file for divorce as he can no longer live with a 498a wife.
I will listen to his whole case and tell him to make preparations for a potential DV case or Maintenance case.
I will tell him to somehow try for compromise with the wife through family elders or lawyers so that he can get out of this mess quickly.
I will tell him to go to a resort alone and relax there eating, sleeping and getting a good body massage.

A wife has filed cases of section 498a, DV act and maintenance case against a guy about 6 months back. He and his parents are on bail now. Who do you think can deliberately do a lot of damage to him now?

Judge, court mediator and his own lawyer.
The opponent lawyer and his wife.
His wife and her parents, who made her file these cases in first place.
Police, judge and his own lawyer.

A lot of victimized men are calling you on phone for guidance from nearby city every month since last 6 months. That city is 120km away. What will you do?

I will consult and give idea to leaders in my chapter, who can train these men to start a new helpline and new chapter in that city.
I will tell these men to start a local chapter and start meeting each other in their city. I will visit the city myself next month.
I will tell them to come to my city and attend weekend meetings here.
I will give them advice on phone only.

What is the key to successfully dealing with false cases by wife and harassment by courts?

Getting very good legal advice and citations.
It is all a function of attitude.
Having a very good lawyer.
Filing numerous counter cases on wife to build pressure.

A guy is separated from his wife and his wife is threatening a police complaint against him. He wants you to help him and he wants a good lawyer. What will you do?

I will suggest him to speak to the wife through family elders and talk sense into her that police complaints and court cases do not help one and it is important to settle these disputes peacefully between families.
In general, SIF (Men’s Rights Movement) should have a list of good reliable lawyers.
If police arrests him, we all must go to police station to show solidarity and give moral support.
I will tell him to change his location and stay at a different address.

If you do not get divorce even 4 years after you filed it, how will you feel?

I will feel frustrated and angry at the Family Court.
I will accept the situation and enjoy life.
I will feel as if my life is ruined.
I will have hope that I will get divorce in a year or two at most.

What is Leadership according to you?

Leadership is all about having right ideas and making people follow you.
You are a great leader if you can challenge, motivate and inspire new leaders.
Leadership is all about planning and getting all the campaigns executed efficiently.
Everyone looks for your suggestions and praises you when you are a leader.

A lot of abused men do not protest and do not participate in activism before, during or even after they have faced the problems.

Because they feel nothing will change even if they protest.
Because, they are selfish and they have no courage to stand against authorities.
Because they think the laws are good, but they should not be misused.
They have no energy after fighting all the court cases.

What are your views about men, who commit suicide due to marital problems?

Most men commit suicide due to economic problems, not due to marital problems.
Men who commit suicide due to marital problems are idiots.
Married men who commit suicide often feel helpless.
Men must teach women lessons rather than committing suicide.

What is the most dangerous aspect of section 498a of Indian penal code?

Even thousands of innocent mothers and sisters of husbands are harassed and thrown in prison.
This law is non-bailable and all accused are considered guilty until proven innocent.
It gives an opportunity for police and judiciary to run a huge extortion mafia.
Often innocent men lose jobs after going to jail for a few days.

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